Happily Ever Parker
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Why Don't You Sleep?



I've been rocking you staring
At the clock on the nightstand
And I've been sitting here praying
Praying your eyes stay closed. 

It's just another sound outside 
And your eyes will fly open
And I'll be sighing
I'll be begging you, baby
Begging you to sleep
When I lay you down at 7pm
I pray that it will keep
Oh, for the next time we'll be here
will probably be in less than three hours

Why don't you sleep?
I'm down on my knees
I'm so tired of being tired
Don't I give you all the breast milk that you need?
When the sandman calls your name
There is one thing you should know
Nights don't have to be like this
Baby, why don't you sleep?

They keep telling me, baby
There will come a time
When I lay you in your crib
And you will possibly sleep until nine
Well, I don't think that's the truth
And I don't like being aloof
I just need eight hours
It's too much exhaustion to bare
what if I stroke your hair?

Why don't you sleep?
I'm down on my knees
I'm so tired of being tired
Don't I give you all the breast milk that you need?
When the sandman calls your name
There is one thing you should know
Nights don't have to be like this
Baby, why don't you sleep?

I can't take it much longer
But my will is getting stronger
And I think I know just what we have to do
It's time to let you cry it out
little lady please don't pout
I've been weak for your tears
but you're aging me in years
So, the next time you will find
you won't be leaving your bed for mine

You're going to sleep!
I'm turning the monitor volume down
Looks like you are going to cry a little longer
Need to make my cocktail stronger
 When the sandman calls your name
There is one thing you should know
I'm never far from you
Baby, sweet dreams

*Inspired by the song "Stay" Jennifer Nettles of Sugarland
Sleep?! Whats that?

5 months 01.20.15


Hey sweet little lady! Yesterday you turned five months old and I know I say it each month - but slow down!! The older you get and more in tune with the world around you the quicker time seems to pass.

Since we don't have a doctor appointment this month my guess is you are weighing in pretty close to the 15 lb. mark. You are mostly in 6-12 month clothing and we just moved you up to a size three diapers.

Loving this month is your feet and screaming like a cat. Especially while laying down on the kick and play. You are pretty awesome out and about and are a champ both in the car and in your stroller. You love putting weight on your legs and standing up straight. Also your hands, Sofie and just about anything you can put into your mouth.

Hating this month is still sleep. You take short little snoozes (I'm talking 40 minutes or less) and fight bedtime. Once you are finally asleep you decide you miss me and let me know multiple times throughout the night. You still are not a huge fan of tummy time and I blame this all on me. Sorry baby!

Some photos leading up to your 5th month

Mine. Ours. Always.
pPs we love you

Scenes from the Weekend


Do you ever want to purchase something that you know is wildly popular but for some reason you hold off? Well I feel like that with these amazing pants I bought at Lululemon last Friday. I was feeling like I deserved a treat for going back to work and what better than pants I can only wear at home? Anyways, these rock and I know lulu is on the pricey side but to that I say, whatever! You only live once!

Wunder Under Pant *cotton
Umm hello roll down top, my 5 month post baby body sort of LOVES you. Anyways had to give those pants a shoutout - since the majority of my three day weekend involved lounging in them. They even got the 15 minute speed cycle on the washing machine because I wanted to wear them again on Sunday! #guilty

I so loved having an extra day with my girl - it actually made me feel ready to tackle the work week. Definitely helps having an extra day of weekend. If you follow me on insta you also saw I am going to try and make that permanent. Fingers crossed.
Because really all days should have a little of this in it. Hope you all had a wonderful weekend and yay to it already being Tuesday!!

Babies Don't Keep


I'll never forget that moment when you were placed on my chest and I looked right up at your dad as tears cascaded from the corners of my eyes.
So proud. He was, we were, so proud.
Your wrinkly feet, your head full of hair, your small pitiful cries. Every moment I wanted to swish an imaginary bottle through the air and seal it inside. So that from time to time I could twist off the cap just a little to be hit with the freshness of the memory.

Babies Don't Keep

We brought you home and had no idea how to put you into the carseat. You were so tiny and I marveled at you in the back seat in a Norco induced pain free state. Your dad drove so slow the 1.2 miles home and I was eager with anticipation to see Finn. Your dog big brother. I remember how light that car seat felt carrying you into the house.

Babies Don't Keep

I remember the hard nights. The nights you would cry and I would just plop down on the floor next to you in tears. A cry bond of sorts. I remember staying in my pajamas all day (one time I didn't even open the curtains!) and wondering how on earth I was ever going to feel confident taking you out of the house. Even though those were hard times. I wish I could have bottled them up.

Babies Don't Keep

At 16 days I decided it was time to leave the house. I bundled you up, strapped you in and off we went. Just you and me. You did so well and I was so happy. "I got this!" I thought to myself. But then I got overly confident and tried to take you to a restaurant at lunch while you were hungry. Bad move mom. Breastfeeding was still ummm...painful? I am pretty sure I was sweating on you while you were trying to latch while screaming your head off.

Babies Don't Keep

I watched you grow. And then we hit a milestone of smiles. Usually dad always got them (he is handsome so I don't blame you). When you gave them to me I melted. Finally I was not just a milk machine. I was a real life mama. Your mama. My mini. Mama & Mini.

Babies Don't Keep

Once we finally figured out a routine of sorts mama had to go back to work. I think I took it a bit harder than you. You started outgrowing your clothing. Cooing and laughing. My goodness you're growing so fast. Maybe it's because I am away from you for so much of the day but it seems rapid. Where is that imaginary memory bottle?

Babies Don't Keep

Yet how I wish nothing more for you. You are thriving. Growing. Learning new things everyday. You're still very much a baby and now I know you always will  be. Mine. Ours. Forever.

Babies Don't Keep



Listening to - Presley cry. Why on earth will this child of mine NOT SLEEP? Sometimes it feels like I am the only person on earth who's baby doesn't sleep through the night. She usually goes down easy for an hour but then wakes up fighting it. I am talking awake until 10-11pm. Mama is tired...send help (and coffee, lots of coffee).

Reading - What Alice Forgot This is our selection for book club and I was way late in picking it up to read. I mean reading with a baby at home is sort of wishful thinking. However now that I am back at work (and pumping twice a day) I am devouring this book. I am about halfway through and really enjoying it.

Watching - The Affair on Showtime. SO GOOD!

Purchasing - pulling the trigger on a Longchamp tote. Now that I carry my pump to and from work I wanted a bag that was large enough for it that closed with a zipper. I am going to retire my always dependable LV for now because it doesn't have a shoulder strap and this pump is just too heavy! I got so used to only using my diaper bag while I was on maternity leave!

Coveting - a vacation. I know I just got back from 4.5 months off but let's be real that was NO vacation. I want to go somewhere warm and pack coverups and swim diapers.

Needing - sleep, please just eight uninterrupted hours.

Loving - This series of photos I can't even...

Wishing - P would sleep through the night. See a theme here? Okay I am going to bed while I have an opportunity!