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Heavy hearted

Tonight I put my baby to sleep in her crib.

I read her a story, I listened to her slurp her milk, I watched her tiny hands rub her tiny eyelashes.

After I said "I love you, sweet dreams" and closed the door to her bedroom. I got terribly sad. The headlines coming out of Orlando, FL this week have been nothing short of a nightmare. A young singer shot for living out a dream, a hate crime and the deadliest mass shooting in America, and now the story of young Lane Graves, attacked and killed by an alligator.

I have thought about that sweet baby boy all day. How he is my daughter's age. Can likely say mama, dada and maybe I love you. I've thought about how when they return to the airport a carseat will be empty on the ride home. Maybe old cheerios in the cupholder, a favorite toy left in the seat.

I opened the door to my daughter's nursery and went in and picked her right up. Her soft curls laying into my face, her cheek finding the perfect resting spot on my shoulder. I sat there and I just rocked and hugged her. We read another book and looked up at the stars illuminating her ceiling. I just needed to hold her again, to feel her.

I hugged her tighter tonight because of Lane. I hugged her tighter because my heart aches, it physically hurts in my chest, imagining the road ahead for the Graves family. I cannot stop thinking about them, about Lane, how that could have happened to anyone. There is no debate to be had here. It could have happened to anyone.

Hug your babies.

Rest in Peace Lane



12 comments

  1. This whole thing just makes me so sad. I just can't imagine watching your child bring stacked ny an alligator. As parents we just want to keep them safe and then that happens. I'm just speechless.

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  2. Just breaks my heart...I can't stop thinking about it either.

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  3. Amen. It could have happened to my niece as we were in this exact same spot just 3 months ago. Heartbreaking. Makes me physically sick

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  4. I have a two year old and the thought of never seeing her precious face again. Never hearing I lub you mommy, or means do it again. Heartbreaking. Rest in peace sweet boy. May his family somehow find comfort in the arms of their families and friends.

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  5. This has rocked me to my core! I just can't imagine what that family went through and is going through and will go through. So incredibly sad!

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  6. I keep reading the news reports on this and I keep getting sadder and sadder. Such a heartbreaking thing to happen to a family who were just trying to spend time together. The internet trolls making accusatory attacks against the parents just makes it all worse. Such a sad and heartbreaking thing to happen to a family.

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  7. My heart breaks in a million pieces for that family. It truly could have happened to anyone.

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  8. So truly heartbreaking. I can't even begin to imagine. So many prayers for the Graves family and everyone effected by these Orlando tragedies. Sometimes life is brutally heartbreaking.

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  9. I can't go on FB anymore without losing it. This one really hits home, we live in FL, we go to Disney, we've been there. I may never let Aria touch the ground again...

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  10. So terribly sad -my heart aches for his sweet family x

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  11. This is so horribly heartbreaking. I cannot stop thinking about that little boy and what that poor family must be going through. How devastating. I'm holding everyone a little tighter these days.

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